It is the time of year (in the northern hemisphere) to stay indoors, work on projects and have long chats with friends near the fire. I’ve also personally used the time since Samhain as a ‘no time’ to really think about my life and where I want to go next. With the winter solstice now past I find that I’m in a quiet place of peace with my life. I know where I want to go next and as soon as I get over having the H1N1 flu (5 weeks of sickness and counting) I’ll be changing gears into working again. Quiet peace has been missing from the heart of me for so long that I’m treasuring it and the silence now.
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Last year I spent three feverish hours making a necklace. I got the idea and finished within five minutes of the sun aligning with Newgrange. It was amazing and exhausting. Given that I’ve been ill for the last two weeks I doubt that I’ll do that this year. Still, it was a fantastic experience. As I come to the end of the calendar year I find myself reflecting on why I do things. I allow myself the time to figure out what works and what really doesn’t in my life. Am I spending my time truly doing things I love or am I doing them because I’ve been doing them? It’s interesting what momentum gives us, isn’t it? And there is absolutely nothing wrong with doing the same thing – as long as that same thing has a deep value. I stopped making jewelry for a while because I got lost in the rest of my life. Because making jewelry (for that moment) didn’t do anything but feel like a burden and one I didn’t have time for at that. Now that things have calmed down again I’ve started to make a few pieces that will go up, hopefully before the end of the year. Winter Dances with frozen cold fingers c. J. Buschbaum 11/29/2009 It is nominally winter here. Winter in this part of California means rain and cooler temperatures. Leaves fall off the trees and it gets overcast. Where I was raised this meant autumn, not winter. One must adapt to nature, not nature adapting to what you expect or want it to be. My tiny garden sleeps, I wear coats that are water resistant and have broken out the hot chocolate. Soon I’ll be heading to the storage locker to get out the Yule tree and ornaments (mostly for the cats). What is your winter like? (as promised part 3 of 3). This was written by me and done as a guided meditation. The old calendar says that the time between Samhain and Yule is the time between. Know that tonight is not the only time to let go of the old and embrace the new. Allow yourself, this year, to take these lessons stretch them over the next few months. Please get comfortable. Take a chair or a spot on the floor. We’re going to journey to the Otherworld, the home of Cernunnos. There is where our work lies. Close your eyes, relax. No danger can come to you here in this sacred space between the worlds. Think on this place as a sphere of intent – a self contained much like our own flesh contains us and our minds we have expanded that to this common space. We carry with us all we need as we journey. We go through the blackness of space – all around is darkness with the tiny points of light – each representing an otherworld. Look up, just a little, that star ahead is where we are going. Reach for it, pull it to you as much as it pulls us in for this is, as always, a relationship between here and there. Ourselves and the gods. It draws closer, fills your vision but does not burn. It is warmth and comfort. Exactly what you need it to be. Gently touch down on verdant grass. This is the forest primeval. Leaves rustle in the wind. Birdsong you don’t recognize echoes over your head. Loamy earth and water scents fill your nose and lungs with each breath. Take a moment to ground yourself in this otherworld. Know this place as a touchstone. Walk. Pick one of the many paths that are ahead. They all lead today into the deeper shade of the forest. Cernunnos waits for us there. This is his home. This is his place of rest and recovery from the world that he shares with us. This is where he comes where it is always summer. Cernunnos. Guardian of the Forests. Cernunnos, Defender of the Animal Tribes, Cernunnos, Source of Deep Forest Wisdom Cernunnos, Warrior Cernunnos, Poet Cernunnos. He is here. Seated beneath a great tree – shadowed if you wish – in the bright beams if that is your need. Take a seat with him, as close as like. He is here as support, as guide, as friend, as lord. Breathe in, the peace of this world. Exhale, and relax Breathe in, the promise of the new year. Exhale, release the last year’s pains. Breath in the otherworld Exhale and let go. In your hands make a ball of energy – it holds everything from the past year you don’t want any more. That you don’t need. That weighs you down with its outgrown expectations and needs. Put the old patterns in there that you’ve held onto thoughtlessly. Put the negative qualities that you despise in there. Pack it in tight. Make it into a dark ball. Allow no strings or stray pieces to stay attached to you. It is a thing unto itself. Now – throw it into the air as hard as you can. As it leaves your hands it transforms – becomes a comet of light because in releasing it you’ve relased yourself. It becomes light and power. It flies into the sky and vanishes. You’ve made space for the possibilities of the new year. Talk with Cernunnos or simply take comfort in his presence as you look again at the choices you thought on this week, ones that now lie ahead of you in this new year. Listen to your heart. Let those possibilities fill you to overflowing. Promise your inner self to be as true to those dreams as you can. Trust that even if your conscious self forgets, the rest of you, and this place, and Cernunnos stands witness to those promises and will do their best to remind you and keep you on your own chosen path. Now, tune in again to this Otherworld. Listen to the trees, to the earth, to water. To the whispering voice of the god, Cernunnos as he speaks. With a final moment of respect to him, you stand. Know that you can find this place, find him at will. A gentle sidestep is all you need and you can be here again. Look around, breathe in the air that invigorates. Touch the nearest tree and feel the slow heartbeat of its sap as we prepare to bid farewell to this place. Farewell Cernunnos, Warrior and Poet Farewell Cernunnos, Protector and Guardian Farewell Cernunnos and know that we honor your wisdom Farewell. Your feet leave the earth, the colors slowly bleach out. Leaving blackness and the faint light of stars. You know your way home. You are still within the sphere of our making. You can once again feel your own heartbeat. Your fingers and toes, The weight of your eyelids and gentle rasp of skin. Take a moment to honor the work you have done. To look, even with fear into the otherworld is no easy task and you have done it. Celebrate in your heart that you are making conscious choices about your life. Now, open your eyes. I offered up two meditations or thought experiments – both on different aspects of death. The first asked you to go and examine yourself in a space where anything is possible. To see the many branching paths that are ahead. To free yourself from the strictures of this world of flesh and bone that we live in for a little while and go as far as your imagination would have you fly. The second was to build on your relationships with those who have passed out of the world of physical touch – of hugs and hellos, of coffee and late nights at a Coco le. Then I asked you to imagine a world without you in it. As so many have before us and we will most certainly – there will be a world without us and far sooner than we are comfortable with admitting. I asked you to think on what a world will be like if one of those closest to you was gone. The day is coming, expected or unexpected when they will leave regardless of what we want. (as promised, part 2 of 3) – These meditation rituals were written for my coven. I did a lot of research this year and wrote several pieces for all of us to work on. The first two were done as independent thinking/meditations and the third I led as a guided meditation. I’ll post one a week. A big piece of Samhain, especially among the wica and certainly among most of the rituals I found online is working with the dead. The Celts (vastly generalizing here, what we know of is mostly the British Isles) believed that there were many Otherworlds. This has been lost by much of the modern understanding and narrowed down to one – the world of the dead – which is what this meditation/activity is about. The veil between worlds is thin at Samhain (I’m suddenly wondering why we think so and where the idea came from – sidebar of research for me later). One of those worlds that we can hear and see and feel best is that of the dead and usually those that we knew that have crossed over. We are tied to them and they to us. Over the next few days (for those that are comfortable with the dead) or in a meditation or quiet hour (for those of us who want a more controlled experience) listen to for them. Look for them. Prepare a favorite dish for someone that’s gone that you miss. Sit and eat it with them. Tell that dear friend what’s going on in your life. Talk with them as you would if they were still here on this plane with you. They only get the news from us and we should share! Be aware that they can call in debts they left unfinished. Remember that you are allowed to ask of them things they can only do on their side as we can only do things on ours. Sit and really make yourself look at the idea of death. Being dead to this world. Flesh grown cold. Your family with a hole in it that used to have you in it. Think of what your world will be with one of your people gone without warning. That there will be a hole in *your* world that will never be filled again. Don’t reminisce about it, think instead of the emotions that you set aside for the laughter or the rueful smiles. Instead, think of the unfinished projects, conversations, trips that will. never. happen. now. Look straight into the darkened cave that takes you into death and chaos as they walk that path without you. Even if you physically die ‘together’ you still walk that final path alone and there is no telling what comes at the end of that walk. You will not find answers here but by allowing yourself to think and feel, perhaps you will gain a little understanding of yourself in this. In honor of… er… everything… Mirth & Reverence is having a SALE!! this week!!! 20% off EVERYTHING in the shop. YUP – All the Greek , Orisha, Wiccan , Soft form, and Horse dolls! YUP – All the Mulit-strand, single strand jewelery! YUP – All the photography! YUP – All the odd Sacra Kate made! Came see! Come Shop! Tell your friends!! Also—- for later… after the sale… |
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